During my internship the summer after my junior year of college, I was told to meet some of the leaders in the functional area in which I worked. Being the rule-follower I am, I promptly made a list, figured out how to set up a meeting (an important skill!), and then met with every senior leader in the building (I was too naive to be shy about it).

One of those leaders was Jen (name changed). In the past 15+ years that I’ve known her, she’s played various roles in my life including leader, sponsor, mentor, and friend.

From Leader to Sponsor

Walking into my first one-on-one with Jen, I had done a ton of research and came with several questions prepared. I don’t recall them now, but we probably talked about how my summer internship was going, how/why her career evolved the way that it did (always an insightful question), and the like. During the conversation, she mentioned that I should consider working in her area, and at the end of the summer, my boss told me that Jen was a Ruchi fan - but, to be honest, I didn’t know what to do with that information. She likes me? Great - now what?

After heading back to school, I began to think about what Jen said and thought that it could be a great next step to shift into her group. I sent her an email letting her know, and before I knew it, I had an offer. It really felt that simple. Jen was a leader in the organization and quickly became a sponsor for me, advocating to others in order to secure the job offer.

From Sponsor to Mentor

I worked for Jen for years and, with time, came changes in both of our career paths. I went off to get an MBA, and she took a position in a new company. We kept in touch while I was in school, and I even met up with her daughter during her college visits.

After graduating with my MBA and working in consulting, I had an opportunity to come back to the same town where Jen worked. Of course, I called her up and asked her about potential job opportunities, what might be a good fit for me, and whom I needed to meet. Ultimately, I landed in the same company where Jen worked, albeit in a different area. After about a year, I had an opportunity to work in the same group as Jen. Yet again, I called on her to give me honest and candid insights - what did success look like for the role? What challenges should I expect? What strengths would be necessary to be successful? Any red flags?

From Mentor to Friend

Jen, being the nicest and warmest human I know, always referred to me as her friend, even when I was multiple levels her junior. Years after meeting, I finally felt I had finally earned the honor. Working together, we collaborated on projects, helped each other manage and develop talent, and called up on each other’s strengths when needed.

We also had many happy hours talking about personal lives, movies, and more. Without really trying, we had become true friends who kept in touch, even after I moved states away. This was all solidified when her daughter (the one that visited me during business school) recently invited me to come and surprise Jen for a milestone birthday party. I gladly flew across the country to surprise Jen at her home and to spend time with her wonderful family. While the party was for her, I felt like a guest of honor to have been invited. Thank you, Jen, for everything. If you are reading this, you know who you are and how much you mean to me.

Mentoring Tips Revisited

In my post on mentorship, I shared 5 tips for meaningful mentorship. Let’s see how those played out in my story about Jen:

You don’t have to know why you want one, but it sure helps: Throughout our relationship, I went to Jen for different things: at first, knowledge of what a career could look like and practice running a meeting; later, it was advice on whether to accept a new position or how to manage a team
Put yourself in positions where you can meet new people: Perhaps it was a bit of naivety, but I was brave enough to set up meetings with senior leaders after it was suggested to me; I found out later that this was recommended to many, if not all of the interns as an informal interviewing process, and I was so glad I took full advantage of the opportunity (hint: not everyone did)
Create genuine connections: I didn’t meet with Jen solely because I wanted something. I asked her about her career because I genuinely cared to learn about it. I asked her advice on a new job because I truly respected her opinion. I was ecstatic when she asked me for advice, because it meant I could give back even a fraction of what she had given to me
Ask: I could have met with Jen once during my internship, and never reached back out to her again. However, I took a chance that I had built a true connection with her and that I could keep coming back to ask her advice - and it worked
Listen: I listened when the internship program mentioned we should set up time with senior leaders. I listened when Jen said she thought I would be a good fit for her team, and I listened to her advice when she gave it. Listening to these whispers led to great advantages.